The Philanthropist’s Nightmare

He waited for her to get home to open the letter. He had a surprise for his wife, and she had one for him.

He (with the help of his lawyer) decided to donate all of his savings to various charities and live off of his small, but sufficient retirement fund. His wife knew about this, so there was nothing going on behind her back. In fact, she was the one who had encouraged him. She had always felt they had too much money for their own good.

His wife walked in with a grave look on her face, holding a piece of paper.

“What’s that you got there, honey?”

“Nothing,” she said reluctantly.

“What’s wrong? You look upset. Don’t be upset; I have good news! We just got the letter from my lawyer making everything official.”


“Honey, say something,” he said in a confused, but encouraging voice. “This is just what you wanted. I waited for you to come home so we can open it together.”

She continued to stare at him, without saying a word, and went over to the couch.

“It’s alright to feel nervous, honey. I’m a little scared too, but we worked everything out before. Remember?”

She put the paper on the coffee table and opened the envelope, which was in fact, from their lawyer, saying that everything has been been confirmed.

“I’ve been hiding something from you–well not really hiding, but–um, you see, I haven’t been honest with you lately. I–uh…”

“What are you saying? You didn’t want to do this? I thought we agreed that–”

“No, it’s not that. I wanted to do this. I–well, read this,” she said while handing him the paper. “Do you remember those tests I took a while ago, when I thought I had something–well actually, I didn’t think I had something, but something was different so I felt I should check it out?”

He stopped reading and put the paper down, then looked at her as if he had been betrayed and said, “yes.”

“Well…it turns out that the thing I didn’t think I had was actually something–cancer.”

He picked up the paper and the paper confirmed what she had been saying. He looked at the letter from his lawyer again, and back at his crying wife, and then burst into an unexpected fit of hysteria.



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